Instincts are a funny thing.
Trust.
My mind has never exactly earned that from me.
Something lives there
and tries to twist those instincts into uncertainties
that might not be real.
But they also COULD be?
It makes my head hurt.
But.
24 taught me that I’m stronger than I thought.
That maybe
I should follow those instincts
even with the heavy weight of risk bouncing on my back
as I walk forward.
My battle will always be with uncertainty.
But it’s one that I’m winning.
And it can’t take away the feelings that come from
swimming in a pool of sprinkles,
laughing so hard that my backside
becomes friends with the pavement,
orange earth and blue sky,
New York glitter,
San Fransisco streets,
Utah skies,
and hearing “Brookie” and “I love you”.
The battle just makes these moments a little sweeter,
and the dark ones a little harder to swallow.
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